N U M B E R S
- The United States government SPENDS over $300 BILLION DOLLARS every MONTH.
- The United States government BORROWS $140 BILLION DOLLARS every MONTH to pay for that spending.
- After working so hard for so long we can barely stand, we are proud to announce to the American people that we have reached an agreement on a budget that will cut an estimated $7 billion in spending. (Unsaid....We don't know how long it will take before you figure out that we are still spending on average about $4 billion dollars a day, so we want to get off this stage quickly!)
- And while we're standing here telling you that the Republicans and the Tea Party forced the Democrats into accepting this tough bare-boned budget, the bottom line is that we just gave President "Money-burns-a-hole-in-my-pocket" Obama, an additional $2.4 TRILLION DOLLARS of "pocket change" in the disguise of a "debt-ceiling increase."
- Now, President "Money-burns-a-hole-in-my-pocket" Obama has to get out of town quickly on a much needed vacation to Martha's Vineyard where he'll stay at a well guarded Democrat donor's mansion, and we will all go back to our home state's where we will hopefully hide-in-a-hole and none of you lousy press bastards or sniveling little tax payers will find us.
- And by the time Congress reconvenes in a month or so, President "Money-burns-a-hole-in-my-pocket" Obama will have collected an additional $100 million for "The Never-Ending Campaign" and all you taxpayers will have forgotten that we fucked you** yet again.
** fecklessAdj.1.feckless - not fit to assume responsibilityirresponsible - showing lack of care for consequences; "behaved like an irresponsible idiot"; "hasty and irresponsible action"2.feckless - generally incompetent and ineffectual; "feckless attempts to repair the plumbing"; "inept handling of the account"incompetent - not qualified or suited for a purpose; "an incompetent secret service"; "the filming was hopeless incompetent"** fucked youAdv.1. fucked you - the good warm feeling politicians get every time they smile at taxpayers / voters and know you don't have a clue how badly they have been screwing you.2. fucked you - SYN. "BOHICA - bend over, here it comes again." The feeling taxpayers / voters get every time a politician moves their lips.3. fucked you - N. disease contracted by politicians and people in power. Earliest known infection Judas Iscariot. Latest known infection, House Speaker Boehner, Senate Minority Leader McConnell, Senate Majority Leader Reid, and of course President Barrack Hussein Obama and Minority House Leader Stretch. Disease is always fatal, personally and professionally - disease is highly communicable.