Wednesday, November 21, 2007

MY CHRISTMAS "WISH LIST" TO YANKEE OWNERSHIP!!!!

Dear Hank and Hal Steinbrenner, Brain Cashman and Manager Joe Girardi,

First, welcome home Joe! You've got big shoes to fill, but all Yankee fans are pulling for you. You'll do great!
Now, down to business - since you four are the closest thing to "Santa" around the Yankees, would you please give ALL YANKEE FANS the following gifts for Christmas.


3 NEW STARTING PITCHERS - all under the age of 30 to replace the geriatric triumvirate of Musina, Clemens and Pettitte. (We love 'em - but we need strong young pitchers that don't need Geritol injections between innings!) And by the way, don't listen to anyone saying you need more hitting, for years the hitting's been fine, it's the pitching that gives Manager's gray hair & ulcers. Trust me, fans get ulcers too! Every time we see Torre take the slow walk to the mound...it's TUMS time! Or, where's the Pepto!

1 TOP QUALITY CLOSER - don't get me wrong, but even Mariano gets a bit tired by the end of the year. And his "long teeth" are getting in the way of his follow through! 'Nuf said?


Obviously, as you've shown over the last 20 years, what your oldest fans think or want isn't something the Yankee's normally dwell on....otherwise you wouldn't have taken the games off regular television or raised ticket prices to a point where I can no longer afford to take my family to a game. But please consider my "2007 Wish List" anyway. (I was debating whether I should include a $10.00 bill just so you'd take my requests seriously - But I don't have it!) Don't worry, you'll soon be making "ga-zillions of dollars" after building that new monstrosity nearby, and with all the new (rich) young (rich) corporate (RICH!) fans you'll be putting into the sky-boxes, you'll be back rolling in the money in no time!!! So, this may be the last time one of your "older" (c.1950) fans will ever have a chance to ask for a favor. Please consider what I ask. Thanks!

Oh yeah, here's one more memory trick" that's always worked for me. Every night when you lie down to go to sleep repeat these words..... PITCHING - PITCHING - PITCHING - PITCHING!!!

Thanks for your time Santa! GO YANKEES!!!!!!!

Ken Johnson

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