HOLDING HANDS???

There's a picture accompanying a Headline News story on NewsMax today showing Nicaraguan President Daniel Ortega holding hands with Iranian President Machmoud Ahmadinejad and waving to the camera. I hope you can all see this in the email ..... (Looks like tomorrow they're going to go pick out a new china pattern!) Yuck!

When did it become the "in" thing for political leaders to walk around holding hands? I've seen President Bush do it with Saudi leaders a few separate times, I've seen the Iraqi President holding hands with Ahmadinejad. Isn't there a picture of Bush and Putin walking in the Rose Garden holding hands? And there's been others I can't think of right off the top of my head because I'm too weirded out by it. Politicians walking and talking and holding hands like it's the most natural thing in the world to do. Frankly, I find this "digital familiarity" a bit creepy!

I consider myself a pretty worldly person. Traveled on business all over. Observed, and been part of cultural exchanges around the world. I've watched the Frenchies "smooch smooch" each other. All over Europe when men meet they exchange "lite smacks" on one - two - or sometimes three cheeks. (Never figured out what determines "it's right" for 1,2,or three cheek kisses?) In Muslim countries it's very prevalent and a matter of courtesy and friendship, (I understand). But when did all this hand holding start with politicians? It seems I've only been seeing this "new political etiquette" in the last year or so. Is this a new State Department initiative?

Listen, I don't want my politicians holding hands - ever! Not as a show of support, not to show the world press we're "friends." JUST STOP IT! I limit hand holding to my wife and daughter; future grand-children; maybe my sister, and absolutely my brother-in-laws family. That's it. I can't think of anyone beyond that limited group I'm groping to glom onto. And even if I were a muckity-muck politician, I can't think of any scenario where something would ever possess me to have myself filmed holding hands, casually walking and talking with another politician - male or female! This just isn't in the cards!

Personally, I don't think this is a very smart or savvy political move! Seriously, I can see this hand-holding backfiring very easily. But maybe you need some convincing.

OK - Close your eyes for a minute......Imagine yourself the President of the United States. Now imagine yourself walking along a path with Vladimir Putin holding hands. An idyllic scene - the Heads of the United States and Russia walking down a woodland path with a group of photographers following 50 feet behind. As you walk, the Russian President, (he likes it when you call him "Vlad"), compliments you on the wonderful dinner he just had with you at Camp David. You say, "thanks Vlad", but remark that the vanilla ice crème has REALLY given you stomach pains! Alarmed, Putin pulls his hand away from yours and backs away - although they can't hear, the press catches the moment and records it in still photos and on video. You, wanting to return things to how they were, lurch awkwardly at President Putin - who backs away further - just as you reach him he trips backward over the stone path edge pulling you down with him! What looks like a "disturbing" wrestling match ensues as the two of you try in vain to dis-entangle and get to your feet. Within 15 minutes the world press plays live feed of what they term "The Altercation at Camp David" and announces that there's been a "major rift" in American-Russian relations. DefCon 2 happens in 27 minutes. The final pictures the media gets are of the United States Secret Service detail kneeling on President Putin's neck with guns drawn, as another member of the group hand and ankle cuffs him! Lovely ! ! ! !

And all because you started holding hands for the cameras!


"Fama volat" - The rumour has wings. (Vergil)